What is an elopement? And should I elope?
I’m going to be smashing some elopement myths and help you better understand what elopements are and if an elopement might be the right way for YOU to get married.
“What is an elopement?”
The word elopement has meant so many different things over the years.
Let’s go over to our queen @merriamwebster for some info.
“Elope's meaning is shifting towards "a small destination wedding" whereas it used to mean "to run away and secretly get married," and before that "for a married woman to run away with a new lover," and even before that it just meant "to escape or runaway" without the romantic context.”
The word “elope” and it’s meaning has changed wildly! And people STILL believe that eloping is two people shamefully running away to get married. It’s NOT 🙅🏼♀️
Eloping has got to be one of the most intimate + meaningful ways two people can get married.
“WHAT is an elopement photographer?”
“What? People DO that?”
“Like a courthouse wedding?”
“I would never let my daughter run off and get married.”
“Are they in a hurry? Is she pregnant?”
“Oh so your job is SUPER easy.”
These are questions and comments I get ALL the time when I tell people I’m an elopement photographer. People STILL don’t understand what an elopement is or what it means to elope. So let’s get EDUCATED 👏🏻
I agree with Merriam here that it mostly means a destination wedding with a limited number of guests.
However, “eloping” means something different to every photographer and to every couple!
Eloping to some people can be under 10 guests for some and under 30 guests for others.
Elopements can involve giant, three day backpacking trips for some and be downtown city weddings for others!
Eloping can be years or planning for some and a “let’s get married next month” for others!
To me, eloping just a means that you’re intentionally choosing to have your day be intimate and centered around the two of you and your interests and your values.
I encourage my couples to allow themselves to have a day that is 100% about them and their love for one another.
THAT is eloping to me.
“Elopement? Like when you run away and get married in a courthouse?” NO 🙅🏼♀️
Like when you run into the great outdoors. 😍
Did you know you can save TONS of $$$ by getting married outside? Sometimes all you have to pay for is a small permit fee. And some places don’t even require a permit! Sedona has TONS of spots that don’t require a permit—like the popular spot Cathedral Rock! Your great outdoors wedding venue can save you thousands!
And how great is it to share your vows and have only the mountains and stars as your witness? You. Can. Literally. Get. Married. ANYWHERE! How freaking cool is that?
Pack your bags and head out to a place you’ve always wanted to visit! Hike up to your favorite mountain and share your love for one another and get freaking MARRIED. That’s the coolest part about elopements! You’re not bound to a venue, you’re not bound to your state, your day can be as adventurous as you want to make it. Share your vows in front of a waterfall in Oregon, have your ceremony deep in a forest in Kauai, take your portraits with a glacier as your backdrop. Feel free to hit me up and we can brainstorm where you can have your dream elopement. One of my favorite things to do is location scouting for my couples! And help them find a location that works perfectly for THEM!
The options are ENDLESS!
If you’re trying to think of where to elope, check out THIS blog for one of my favorite location suggestions. Or check out THIS blog for my 4 best tips on how to pick the location that’s best for YOU.
Here’s another myth that I love busting! The myth that you can’t have ANY guests when you elope! And that if you do choose to have no guests, that means you hate your family! That’s simply NOT TRUE. 🙅🏼♀️
It’s so ingrained in our culture that eloping means running away and getting married without your family. So much that my mom thought that’s what I mean when we told her we’re switching from a traditional wedding to an elopement!
She was SO sad when she thought we didn’t want to include her on our wedding day. But an elopement doesn’t have to mean no guests. You can invite whoever is important to you!
Some people don’t have good family relations and that’s okay! They deserve to get married in a space that is safe and true to them. If a couple doesn’t want any guests—DO THAT! Your wedding day should be what YOU want and what’s authentic to the two of you.
Sometimes couples have great relationships with their family, but they want something private. Getting married is such an intimate moment, and some people want their vows, promises, and wedding day to only be shared with each other. And that’s OK! Being invited to a wedding day is a privilege and not a right.
But if you want your parents there, if you want your best friends there, if you want your dog there, you ABSOLUTELY CAN!
Bottom line, elopements are about what YOU want. It’s about breaking away from the traditional, getting in tune with nature, and focusing the day on what’s truly important—you two sharing your love for one another!
It’s 2020, let’s be kind to one another and encourage couples to get married how they want to get married. 👏🏻
“Elopements are not as important as traditional weddings and only need 1-2 hours of photography coverage!” NO 🙅🏼♀️ That’s 100% UNTRUE.
As I specialize in elopements I have discovered one thing—one to two hours of coverage does not do your wedding day justice! Your elopement day is just as important as a typical ballroom wedding. You deserve to have photos of you getting ready, all of your details you put into your day photographed. Like your mother's wedding dress stitched into yours. Or you wearing your great grandfather's tie.
You deserve to have that “first look” moment captured when you see each other all dressed up to get married for THE FIRST TIME!
You deserve to have your ceremony covered.
You deserve to have the excitement of JUST getting married documented.
And I’ve also started to encourage my couples to think of the day as NOT “just a ceremony and some photos”.
Picture your perfect day from the moment you wake up to the moment the day is over. What do YOU want to do?
Camp overnight and roast marshmallows by the fire.
Have a ceremony by a waterfall and then cliff jump!
Take an off roading adventure to a spot no one knows about.
Hike up to your favorite spot and scream your love from the mountaintop.
See the world from up above in a helicopter tour, land somewhere epic, and then have your ceremony where there’s no one for MILES!
I have an entire blog focused on a bunch of awesome activities you can include on YOUR elopement day. Check it out HERE!
And even if you want to keep your day more simple, understand that things take time! It’s impossible to fully capture (or even slightly capture) getting ready photos in 15 minutes. I like to AT MINIMUM spend an hour with a couple shooting photos of them getting ready! Ideally I like to have an hour and a half to two hours. Think about set up, driving, walking, hiking, etc. Wedding days take time and it’s important to not rush yourself! I’ve become a firm believer in ENJOYING your day! And a huge factor in that is giving yourself enough time to fully enjoy your day! Seriously, you’re gonna feel MAJOR stress if you’re trying to cramp a bunch of things into 2 or 4 hours.
Seriously, there is SO much you can do in a day to make it fun, adventurous, memorable, and totally 100% you.
So what does an “all day” elopement even look like? While we’ve talked about the fact that elopements can look like anything; it’s sometimes hard to actually imagine the day, hour by hour.
So! I’m gonna share an example timeline of an all day elopement at my favorite place ever—Moab!
4AM - Getting ready photos of couple
5AM - Drive to Delicate Arch
6AM - Start hiking Delicate Arch Trail 🥾
7:30AM - Arrive + watch the sunrise over Delicate Arch
Share vows privately with one another + Start taking epic portraits
9:30 AM - Start the hike back down
11AM - Drive to Turret Arch
11:30AM - Arrive + have a picnic and some tequila shots
12PM - Wrap up coverage
And there went EIGHT HOURS! And there’s still so much you could do in the day. That was a timeline fit for a morning couple, lol, but you could also totally work that back from sunset instead!
It’s SO easy to fill up an eight hour day! I work with my couples on creating a timeline that perfectly fits them, their needs, and their hours that they’ve booked with me! If you’ve ever wondered “we certainly don’t need more than two hours of wedding photography” think again! Your day is just as special as any other wedding day + you totally deserve to have every moment covered so you can look back on these moments forever. ✌🏻